In case you didn’t know, the Oscars were on last night. As an Annoying Film Person, you’d think I would be glued to the TV for this austere, once-a-year event. I was not. In fact, I didn’t even watch the whole show.

2011 cinema left me lackluster. Sure, there were a few films I loved – The Tree of Life, Drive, Hugo – but I mostly feel underwhelmed. Where the films at?! The awards show itself held no surprises for me – The Artist and Hugo racked up. There weren’t even any really spectacular dresses to look at, and sometimes that’s half the fun for me (I’m a girl, y’all). The best moments were any time anyone cried (I’m a sucker for tears) and Christopher Plummer. He is like, the best looking 82-year-old man I know. And I don’t even actually know him. And he was once-upon-a-time Captain Von Trapp. Check yes.

However, all my…

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